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Subject: He's running for president
George W. Bush
The White House, Washington DC, USA
Past Work Experience
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I produced a Hollywood slasher B movie
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any
oil in Texas;
the company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal
that took land using taxpayer money.
With my father's help and name, I was elected Governor of
Texas.
Accomplishments as Governor
I changed pollution laws in favor of the power and oil
companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
I replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city
in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted Texas government to the tune of
billions in borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any Governor in
American history.
I became U.S. President after losing the popular vote by over
500,000 votes with the help of major Enron money and my father's
appointments to the Supreme Court.
Accomplishments as President
I attacked and overtook two countries.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively
bankrupted the U.S.
Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S.
history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in
any 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of
the U.S. stock market.
My record for environmental issues is the least of my concerns.
I am the first president in U.S. history to enter office with a
criminal record.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one
year period.
After taking-off the entire month of August, I
then presided over
the worst security failure in U.S. history.
I am supporting development of a "Tactical Bunker Buster" nuke, a
WMD.
I am getting our troops killed, under the lie of Sadam's
procurement of Yellow Cake Nuke WMD components, then blaming the lie
on our British friends.
I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S.
president.
In my first year in office over 2-million Americans lost their
jobs and that trend continues every month.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month
period.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any
president in U.S. history.
I set the record for least amount of press conferences than any
president since the advent of television.
I signed more laws and executive orders effectively amending or
ignoring the Constitution than any president in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and
refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was
revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in
U.S. history and
refused to use national reserves as past presidents have done.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut
in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in war
time.
I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to
simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people)
shattering the record for protest against any person in the history
of mankind.
I've dissolved more international treaties than any president in
U.S. history.
I've made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of
any in U.S. history.
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any
administration in U.S. history.
My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a
Chevron oil
tanker named after her.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have
almost all 50
states of the Union simultaneously suffer massive financial crisis.
I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any
market in any country in history.
I am the first president in U.S. history to order a pre-emptive
attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation, and I did
so against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
I created the largest government department bureaucracy in the
history of the United States.
I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending
increases, more than any president in history.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have the United
Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
I am the first president in U.S. history to have the United
Nations remove the U.S. from the Elections Monitoring Board.
I removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of
congressional oversight than any presidential administration in U.S.
history.
I rendered the entire United Nations viewpoints
irrelevant.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S. "prisoners of war"
(detainees) and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva
Convention.
I am the first president in history to refuse
United Nations
election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the
most corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best
friends, (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation) presided
over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. history. My
political party used the Enron private jets and corporate attorneys
to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election
decision.
I have spent more money on polls and focus groups than any
president in U.S. history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade
Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most
resented country in the world, possibly the largest failure of
diplomacy in World history.
I am actively working on a policy of
"disengagement" creating the
most hostile of Israel-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
I am first president in history to have a majority of Europeans
(71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and
security.
I am the first U.S. president in history to have the people of
South Korea more threatened by the U.S. than by their immediate
neighbor, North Korea.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be
awarded government contracts.
I set an all-time record for the number of administration
appointees who violated U.S. law by not selling their huge personal
investments in corporations bidding for U.S. contracts.
I failed to fulfill my pledge to capture Osama Bin Laden, dead or
alive.
I failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the
leaders of our country at the U.S. Capitol Building. Even after 18
months I have no leads and no credible suspects.
In the past 18 months following the World Trade Center attack I
have successfully prevented any public investigation into the
biggest
security failure in the history of the United States.
I removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any
president in U.S. history.
In a little over two years, I created the most divided country in
decades, possibly the most divided since the Civil War.
I entered my office with the strongest economy in U.S. history and
have turned every single economic category downward -- all in less
than two years.
Records and References:
I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine. My
Texas driving record has been erased and is not available.
I was AWOL from the National Guard.
I refuse to take a drug test or even answer any questions about
drug use.
All records of my tenure as Governor of Texas are now in my
father's library, sealed, and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into insider trading or bankrupt
companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President,
attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and
unavailable for public review.
~ Please consider my experience when voting in 2004. ~
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